Archive for April, 2010

April 28th – Fear or Discernment?

April 28, 2010

I had a dream, and it really taught me the difference between fear and discernment. Not long ago I was teaching a teleconference study, and one gentleman asked me, “Isn’t fear used to help us?” At the time I didn’t have a lot of clarity on that subject, I just believed all fear was from the enemy, but recently learned that it’s not “fear” that comes to our aid, but “discernment and truth” about the subject. So here’s my dream and hopefully it will give you a bit of insight on this subject.

A girlfriend and I went to someone’s house, there were two men. We began talking to them, not sure why we were there, but my friend was interested in one of the men. I just talked and even brought up Tom (my husband) a lot in the conversation. It was time to leave, and she went her way and I went mine. I had a car parked down the road, and noticed someone following me. They were a distance away, but still felt uneasy. I had to get gas, so I went to a gas station and got out of the car to fill it up. There were these 2 guys, they had masks on. I felt something inside me say, “Get in the car and get out of there.” But I said, “I will not fear what man could do to me.” And I stood my ground, I wasn’t going to be chased away by fear. Well, the men had gasoline cans in their hands, and fire proof masks on their heads, they were about to put me and my vehicle on fire! Just then, my older sister Alida showed up and called to me. Just then more people came on the scene, and the men fled.

I had a second dream that same night. I was in a room talking to someone, when they warned me that there was a person outside the room wanting to beat me up. They didn’t like me at all. But the I said, “I will not fear what man can do to me,” as I was talking to this person’s roomate about the Lord. As I continued talking to her, I found myself standing in a bandstand, with hundreds of people sitting and listening as I taught. I remember noticing the crowd and stopped what I was saying to this woman and said, “Does anyone get frustrated here?” Most everyone waved their hands and laughingly said, yes..” I said, “Do you want me to tell you in one line how you can get free?”  More cheers came. I said, “Frustration comes when you are trying to do what only God can do.” So stop it! They all sighed and got a “revelation” on what I just said. Then I turned my attention back to this woman and continued talking and praying for her. She was crying as the Holy Spirit was ministering to her, the crowd began to disburse, it appears they had received what they came for, yet still others lingered, listening intently on what I was saying to this woman. The other woman was still out there somewhere, but I still pressed in to help her friend, in hopes that she would see the light and get free too.

Then I woke up.

Both dreams played a valuable role in what I’m talking about here.

The Lord was quick to interpret, as this is vital to anyone teaching on fear. The thing that happened in the first dream was that “warning” feeling I had was God prompting me to escape. The Bible says that He always gives us a way of escape. But this showed me that I didn’t recognize His voice, but shook it off as fear coming to me. And even though I ended up almost getting hurt, He came to my aid, even when I didn’t obey His voice. I went through some unnecessary things, but in the end, I was delivered. He showed me that many people who hear Him speak, don’t pay attention because they think it’s the enemy talking…  It’s not fear God using, it’s discernment. But we have to know the difference… and that is what we are all here on this earth to learn.

Psalm 139:8 If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.

2 Timothy 3:11 Persecutions, afflictions, which came unto me at Antioch, at Iconium, at Lystra; what persecutions I endured: but out of them all the Lord delivered me.

Then the second dream was that I didn’t run in this situation either, and as I think about it, I was never given “a way out” feeling to run. In this scenario, I was helping someone come to know the Lord and that is ALWAYS a good thing! So there was no reason to run even though my life was in danger.

So I began praying, “Father, help me to know when it is you showing me the way to escape, and when I am to stay and do your will.” I hope that is your prayer too. We need to know our Father’s voice, because He is always ready and willing to go before you, and prepare the way. But we have to listen, and then follow His lead.

1 Corinthians 10:13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

Joel 3:16 The LORD also shall roar out of Zion, and utter his voice from Jerusalem; and the heavens and the earth shall shake: but the LORD will be the hope of his people, and the strength of the children of Israel.

Let’s all take time to learn our Father’s voice so that we don’t ignore it any longer, but receive it with gladness, and obey it, because He is helping us make choices in this life to live full and abundant lives. He only has good in store for us, not evil, he sets before us choices, and depending on that choice is what we will reap. By truly hearing and doing what He prompts in our spirit or says in His word, will “keep us from all harm.” For under His truth is power to overcome the enemy, Satan and his demon army who is out to kill, steal and destroy you. But you have everything you need to defeat him. You have the Word of God, and the power of the Holy Ghost, so let’s start using it – me included!

My husband once said to me, “Linda, you teach Fearless Living classes, yet you come home, curl up on the chair and suck your thumb” (figuratively speaking of course.) Because I let the enemy beat me up! But no more! If we could only see in the spirit what is waiting in the balance to help us, we would speak more in line with God’s Word, not in what the enemy has lied to us about. But, that is a blog for another day…


April 27 – Don’t Let It Get On You!

April 27, 2010

Something transpired these past weeks as I have been studying and preparing for classes ahead, that I believe is going to help you find some more freedom in  your life as it did for me.

Have you found yourself in a room of people, and for some reason you started to feel sad, or rejected, or hurt? You would wonder what it was that you did or said?But just recently, it’s not that at all, most of the time, it’s that we are “feeling” what is in the room! We have ourselves on our mind so much, that we think everything is about us. So once I have began learning to look at things through God’s eyes, not my own, I’ve been seeing more clearly. Now I see hurt and pain, and if that’s what they have, then that’s what they give.

Let me share a personal encounter. I went to a party, and there was a lady there that was sitting alone. So I decided to go talk with her. When she saw me coming, I saw the look on her face like, “What does she want?” But I still kept walking towards her, because really, I don’t know what she thought. So I started a bit of small talk, but it was very obvious by then she didn’t want to be bothered. So I simply said, “have a nice day” and went and visited someone else. I started to “feel” rejected and hurt and why doesn’t she like me – thoughts – then I remembered something I shared on a blog some time ago – that I’m invisible. If I were invisible, I couldn’t get hurt. So that helped, but then the Lord went even further and said, “You aren’t feeling rejection for you, she’s rejecting herself, she is filled with pain, isolation, and anger, and that’s what she is projecting onto you.”

So what I did was say, “Father, I see her heart, I see that it’s not me, but it’s her stuff, and I choose not to allow it to get on me. I forgive her, and release her and I pray for your love and mercy to come and help free her from her stuff.”

See, I realized all these years when I would go away from talking to someone all rejected and hurt or whatever, that is wasn’t my stuff! Because previously of talking to these people, I was feeling pretty good. So how can you feel good one minute and then after talking to someone feel bad the next? It’s not you!!! It’s their stuff getting on you.

We have the power to cast down all things that cause us to lose our peace. And we do that through recognizing that is’t not us (and not even them for that matter, it’s what’s in them) that is causing this feeling. And to forgive them, and refuse to receive their defilement.

Have you ever seen a spiraling effect of this? When one person gets mad, then another gets mad, then that person infects another, and so on? It’s a spiritual battle we are in, and someone has to STOP it! And that person is you! By recognizing it’s not you, but their stuff, you can stop it from ever getting on you and going any further. Let’s start paying attention when our feelings start to spiral down and think of “whom” we were in contact with that day!!

I have been doing this for 3 weeks now and I have remained at peace!!!  There were many many times where I began to “feel” someone elses stuff, and then would do what I just shared, and it would be gone. My feelings were restored to peace, and I had compassion now for that person and prayed for them.

Remember when I shared the story of my husband and the windshield wiper? He took on someone elses incompetence and began feeling bad about himself. Once we realized what was happening, we cast that out as well.

I remember going to Disneyland with my husband Christmas Day… but it was freezing and rainy. When we got back to the hotel we had a huge fight! We never fight, we haven’t had a heated argument in our whole married life, so we knew something got on us. As we thought about it, all those in Disneyland were mad that the weather was so bad, we only heard people complaining, and so what did we get on us? The same. Once we realized it, we told that spirit of strife to Go… and it went, and we were at peace again.

Folks, we are in a spiritual battle, and as long as we allow evil spirits to entertain us, we will not live free. Take your life back now, and begin to pay attention to your life and those whom you associate with and do the word…  John 20:23 “Whosoever sins you retain they are retained, and whosoever sins are remitted they are remitted.”

April 25 – It Is Finished!

April 25, 2010

It is Finished… Jesus said as he took His last breath on the cross. that means he completed the work. With that, He commissioned His disciples (us) to continue with what He started. Teach men to observe and do all that He said, making disciples of all men, laying hands on the sick, casting out devils, raising the dead, and taking up our cross to follow Him.

John 8:32 says, “We shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free.” We all quote that scripture, yet we aren’t free in areas. Why? There are two reasons I can think of: 1) We dont’ want to see the truth. Many don’t want to see what’s in their heart, they just want someone to come along and wave their hand over them, they don’t want to take any responsibility. 2) We don’t read the rest of that passage, because the answer is given in vs. 33. We shall be made free from truth,  IF you continue in My Word.

What Word? I’ll sum it up in this one passage – Matthew 22:37-40 – Someone asked Jesus what is the greatest commandment of all… and He said, “You are to love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength, and your neighbor as you love yourself, upon this hang all the law and the prophets.”

So we have to ask 0urself, where is the relationship breaches in our lives? We have to forgive everyone, we have to forgive ourself, and we have to receive the forgiveness from God personally. And… we have to believe without a doubt that God loves us through and through. We  have to Believe what the Word says and Do the Word. (James 1) If you have a hard time, then ask for God’s help. Confess that you are having difficulty with believing, ask Him to “Help your unbelief.” Be truthful with Him, and even though you don’t “do” everything right, by being honest is the first step toward staying clean before Him. And as we find ourselves sinning or in a pickle again, come to Him… each and every time and receive forgiveness.

Our physiology is dependent upon our psychology which is dependent on our spirituality. So we have to get things going in our spirit so that the rest follows.

Jesus gave us what we needed to be well. And being sick is just a chemical imbalance. Too much or too little secretion of chemicals makes dis-ease. We need a balanced body. Jesus said “by his stripes we are healed.” Our bodies have everything we need to be healed! Did you know that when your body is balanced chemically, you aren’t going to be sick? Because once things are in place “spiritually” your body heals itself. It’s not a miracle, it’s not even a healing, it’s just putting back into balance that which was already there.

Now there are some things that are from poor eating, taking care of the temple stuff, but I’m talking about our spiritual health here that impacts 80-90% of our health issues.

I urge you to pursue peace… isn’t that what the Word says? Why, because God knew that peace produces balanced chemicals producing healthy bodies, so you can go out and do and be all God has called you to. Peace doesn’t just fall on you, you have to go after it, and one of the areas that produce peace is patience. If you aren’t willing to ask for that, then you may never find the peace you desire for perfect health. But I am believing for you now, that you won’t stay there, that you will ask God to work patience in you so that your peace comes… That you will continue in the Word and love and forgive everyone, even those who hurt you a long time ago. And keeping your heart and mind on Him who is the giver of peace. Then by combining these things, you will see a transformation in your heart and life, which is peace.

April 21 – Final Battle

April 21, 2010

Hello friends, it’s been about a week since I’ve been able to share my heart with you, I have been out of town going about my Father’s Business…  Laying hands on the sick, casting out devils, setting captives free, and raising the dead… well, haven’t had an opportunity on that one… yet!

In my last blog I wrote about “Can we raise the dead?” This is the 2nd part to that, and I’ll share it as the Lord gave me a vision.

I saw a number of people on horses, no number could be named, and in front of all those dressed in white on white horses was the King of King and Lord of Lords. He was on a grand white stallion, dressed in white, he had on a breastplate, carrying a large sword, and his mouth was filled with power of the Word of God. We were preparing for battle.

From the sky we all began racing toward earth, Jesus out in front. As we got closer to the earth to see the evil that had overshadowed the earth, he looked back and said to us, “You do not do anything, I am going to destroy evil today with this Sword of the Spirit and the Word of my mouth, and wipe them out with one sweep and one breath.” As we continued, he then looked back and said, “Today you will see the power that is in the Word and the Sword of the Spirit, and you will be sad this day because you had this same power while you were on earth, but didn’t use it.”

After that vision, something happened to me. My heart was filled with faith more for those things that we are able to do, here now. I believe we all have the same things Jesus has, we just have to believe we have it, and then go and do something with it. This is not to bring anyone to guilt or condemnation, but to wake us up to the awesome ability that we actually have in Christ. If you are born again and filled with the Spirit of God, you have these same abilities. Jesus even said that we will do MORE than He did while he was on this earth!

Where ever you are, whatever you do, wherever you go, we need to keep this in our heart and mind, that we have what people need! We can represent God well here on this planet when we truly believe who we are.

April 13 – Can We Raise The Dead?

April 13, 2010

Have you seen the scriptures that say that those who believe will be able to heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, cast out devils, and raise the dead?(Matthew 10:7-8; Mark 16:17) And in my experience, I’ve seen almost all of these, except one, raise the dead. However, I’ve heard it happening. Just listened to an Indian man who raised 2 babies from the dead. God has given this ability to us, but because we don’t believe it fully, we don’t see it happening much. But I’m here to tell you, that is all going to change! This is what the Lord showed me in the wee hours of the morning.

God was given me visions and thoughts of the amazing things that we are going to start doing and seeing in the time ahead. His spirit is going to pour out and we are going to see miracles like never before, and He is going to use us – “those who believe” to carry this out.  I want to address one in particular:  raise people from the dead. He told me that we need to understand this resurrection power, because we will be using it soon. People will be killed and we will lay hands on them and they will recover! Then He said, “The enemy knows this plan of mine, to equip the Saints to do this, and that is why his choice of killing will be cutting off their heads.”  This is so simple, I never saw it before. Because once your head is gone, there really isn’t much chance of getting it put back on and being raised from the dead. And, in Revelation 20:4, it says that many will die when their heads are cut off who do not bow down to the anti-christ and His beast. So, that is a final blow.

Then he went on to remind me of the scripture in Revelation 13:3 that the first beasts  “deadly wound would be healed.”  So this is just God’s way of saying that if the enemy can raise the dead, we most certainly can too!!

Let’s start taking the Word at it’s Word and believe. God wants to use you, and he’s grooming an army to fight that good fight of faith. Let’s get into the game here, and recommit ourselves to anything that the Lord wants us to participate in. He won’t go against your will, nor force you, nor control you, so you have to choose. Do you want to be one of these who really impact the world, or one who sits on the sidelines and watch as people around you are destroyed. Because, even though it’s not that extreme right now, we can begin now by sharing our faith for those who have not yet trusted in the Lord Jesus Christ as Savior.

I believe it’s time to amp it up, including me, to go out and be used of the Lord to gather His sheep into the fold. So that when the great and terrible day comes, we will be safely protected by the Chief Shepherd Himself, Jesus.

This isn’t to bring you fear, but truth that will make you free. If you have fear, then you need to reevaluate your own heart to see if you truly “believe” God’s love, provision, and care. 1 John 4:18 says that God’s perfect love casts out all fear and torment. And when we look at the love God had for Jesus, yet sent Him to the cross, we will also have to face death one day, but not to fear it, but trust God that whatever end it is, it will glorify Him! And then we’ll stand in His presence as He says, “Enter into my rest, thou good and faithful servant.”

April 11 – Do You Have a Holy Bible?

April 11, 2010

I recently conducted a Bible Study, and as we were getting into the reading of the scriptures, I noticed several had different Bible versions. So I decided that each person who has a different Bible read out of theirs to compare the texts. We started with Romans 1:1. “There is now therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” who walk not after the flesh but after the spirit.” KJV. Here is the NIV:  “There is now therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” What is missing? The most important part, what causes guilt and condemnation and how to find freedom!  Some just say, “Oh cool, I’m in Christ so I’m never going to be under any condemnation.” But then life happens and you find yourself “under” guilt and condemnation, and get confused and end up saying, Does God Love me? Am I Really Saved? You will have doubts cast upon the Word of God! That is the enemy’s plan, and that is why he is creating “new” translations yo get you to “think” wrong about God.

Another point I made in this class is that the KJV is the only Bible that doesn’t need approval to quote it in your books and materials. All other versions of the Bible have copyrights. Hear me here:  If a book is copywritten, it means it came from an original thought, or it was significantly altered from the original text. I have to say that alone makes me cringe. The Bible is clear that if anyone change or remove the words written in the book, the plagues of the Bible will be upon them (Revelation 22:18).

So I ask: Is anyone sick? Is anyone having relationship issues? Is anyone in bondage? Perhaps you are not reading the Holy Bible but a holey Bible.

When comparing versions, there is a theme going on here. The trinity of God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit are being replaced with:  “the One” or “The Father” or “He” actually preparing for one person to come along and make himself out as the messiah. Isn’t that what we are heading to now? There will be a false Christ, the anti-Christ who is going to come and set himself up as the long awaited Messiah? But only to decieve the people into believing a lie! Don’t let it be you! We have to read the Whole Word, not the parts the enemy or others want us to see.

In the Bible study several were angry at themselves for not knowing this. Many have told me, “Oh quit splitting hairs, at least they are reading the Bible” or “Don’t go there, it really doesn’t matter.” But at whose expense? Your own life! We have to be Berean and study the Word, but we need to study the True and Holy Word.

I use a Bible called: “King James Version – Easy Reading.” They do not take out the words or change meanings, they simply take out the old english. And even in that, I always refer to the original KJV I have to be sure that one isn’t at all transferred incorrectly.

I truly support the KJV. It was the Bible I was saved with so I am partial to it, but after learning of the differences in other translations, I was glad I got a hold of the truth from the beginning.  Did you know that it is easier to memorize the KJV, even with it’s “old English antics” as it is for any other version? As a matter of fact, the KJV is at a 5th grade reading level, while others are at the 12 grade. Do you know how that is gauged? By how many consonants are in each word! The KJV has around 2, the NIV has 3, very cumbersome.

This is for you just to re-evaluate what Bible you read. If you really like your version, that’s cool, just be sure to pick up a KJV to compare context. You will also find that it is even easier to understand at times. And those times where you don’t understand, ask God to help you understand. After all, that is what the Holy Spirit does, he teaches us all things!

For more information on the Bible versions go to:

April 10 – Guilt

April 10, 2010

Hello all, sorry it’s been almost a week since my last blog…

I awoke this morning thinking about something that happened last evening. I felt guilty for something that didn’t come out right, and it was my responsibility. How many have ever felt that? But, I was also freed from it almost as quickly as it came… now wouldn’t you like that too? So here goes:

When we feel guilty, it’s mostly due to having had said or done something yourself. For example when you say something to someone and then immediately say, “Why did you say that?” to yourself. First of all, this question is a good question, but if we don’t process it properly, it will become condemnation. How do you process this thought properly? First of all, the truth does come to us as what was your motive. If we handle this question correctly, we would answer by saying, “I said this because you did something wrong. What did you do wrong? You disappointed someone or something like that. And the real root here is fear of man, and rejection. So then you simply say, “Father, I said this because I was being self-righteous, and fearing man, and wanted to protect my reputation, forgive me, and restore me, and I forgive myself.” Then the guilt and any fear associated with it has to go! That is what “convictions” do, causes us to make a conscious decision for our change of heart in the Lord. BUT… if you don’t do that, it will most likely eat at you and turn into guilt.

So once you have confessed this to the Lord, taken responsibility for your part in it, then send that person a note or talk to them asking for their forgiveness.

There was a time I went with a friend to a restaurant that was owned by someone I went to church with. They weren’t in church that day so when I went in to eat I asked him, “Didn’t see you at church today.” and then I said, “We prayed for you.” Okay, now, the first part was okay, but then when I said, “We prayed for you.” My heart felt that jab! Why did I say that? So I left the restaurant “feeling” guilty. I immediately applied what I’m saying here, to that situation by saying, “Father, I admit I wasn’t very nice, that sounded judgmental and self-righteous, Father forgive me, I repent, and I forgive myself. I also pray that my friend forgives me.” And immediately following that type of prayer, the “guilt” was gone! I was able to go about my day and enjoy the Lord. Not “feeling” bad like I normally would have. So then later that same day, I ran into this restaurant owner. I said, “I have to apologize for my comment earlier today, I ask you to forgive me.” He said, “Well, it did make me feel bad, and yes I forgive you.” We were both freed that day and our relationship continued as though that never happened!

Confessing whatever it is that we felt guilty for is key! Because guilt is simply a manifestation of the actual issue.

Now I hear some of you saying, But what about guilt for doing something good? Like feeling guilty for taking a vacation or doing something for yourself from time to time. There is also “sin” in that! Jesus came to give us life abundantly. So it’s not a sin to have some joy in your life. And we normally “feel” bad because we think we are disappointing God in some way because we aren’t being spiritual at that moment. Dear friends, every day you breathe air, you are being spiritual – if you are a believer. You are spirit right now! You have a body that encases your being, your spirit. You are “righteous” right now. Even when making the bed, you are being spiritual. Because you are taking care of what God has given you! You are being good stewards of your life. That is a full-time job in itself! So, go enjoy a bubble bath, a good movie, a walk in the park, gardening. See, God is our Father, he is a creator. He loves making things, so why wouldn’t you? He walked with Adam in the garden, why couldn’t you? It’s because as I said earlier, the enemy is out to destroy you! And if he can get you to “feeling” bad, he’s got you where he wants you, because the longer you “think” these things, he knows it will cause your immune system to be compromised. He’s out to kill, steal from you, and destroy you!

It’s time to stop him.  It all starts back with this “feeling” of guilt. Take to heart what I shared, and the enemy will have no rights to you and will not be able to get  you to fall into his snare. Remember, fear is the devil’s only tool to get at you…

April 4 – It’s Resurrection Sunday!

April 4, 2010

I love this time of year! The flowers are in bloom, signs of new life in nature, lots of bugs…  okay, so it’s not always that great, and frankly today was cold and dreary… So let’s look at what is good, it’s the time where we celebrate Jesus completing the work on the cross, and rising from the dead and now sits at the right hand of our Father in Heaven. Boy, all that in 1 day! With God all things are possible, that is for sure. And because of that we live! Wow..

I hope you take a moment to focus on Him and give Him praise for what He has done for us. He came to save the World., and that is you and I. He even came to save other cultures, and those who don’t believe there is a God at all. Did you know the Bible says that He is kind even to the unbelieving and wicked? God is love, and that’s that. And it’s only because someone dones’t “believe and receive” that it doesn’t happen for them.

But what I wanted to share with you on this glorious day is the reason perhaps some use a rabbit to celebrate with. I can get into all the pagan religious type stuff, but I am not going to. What I did observe was that for the past few years every time, a few days before or even on Easter Sunday, I would see a cotton tailed bunny! Yep, running out ahead of me on the dirt road we live on. I just am amazed. I also then recall around Thanksgiving that I would see lots of Turkeys. So now I know why bunnies were connected to Easter, and turkey’s were connected to Thanksgiving. Those were out at that time. Of course, this is just my observation.

The bottom line is that Easter is to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ. Because without the resurrection, there would be no salvation and we would all be doomed and life would have no meaning. But because of His death on the cross, burial AND resurrection, we have hope of that salvation. We have something to hold on to, to believe in, and joy and peace to live our lives – that blessed Hope that only comes from the Lord. We can all have that hope, just by saying with a true believing heart, “Jesus, you are my Lord and my God.” I like that!

April 3 – Army Ants

April 3, 2010

What a glorious weekend, to celebrate the reason we live! Because of the resurrection of Jesus Christ! He is our King, Our Lord and Our Savior!! How much better can that be? And the only reason I can be writing these blogs…

Today I wanted to share something truly amazing. I go through so many changes daily, and here’s one that I hope will bless you as it did me.

While talking with a friend of mine, she said something that caused me to get jealous. Yep, I did! It just hit me between the eyes, and I didn’t “mean” to feel that way, but I just couldn’t genuinely be happy for her, though I said I was. I hugged her and said, “I’m so happy for you.” but my heart wasn’t in it… I was jealous. It wasn’t envy, it was jealousy. (There is a clear difference) But at the time that’s not what I realized. But as I left her and began driving home, I started feeling small, insignificant, and unworthy. Asking myself why I’m even teaching, no one cares, no one is being helped, etc. I went down that Pity Pathway! By the time I got home I was really feeling bad… Then something happened. Because God loves me so much, He had to get in my “stuff” if you know what I mean, and began straightening me out.

First I heard the Holy Spirit say, “You are listening to lies. There are countless hundreds, and some you even know of, that what you teach and offer is setting them free. Just because there was “one” who didn’t receive from your classes but received from someone else, doesn’t mean you failed.” Then the lights went on! I had to repent! I immediately repented for being jealous of my friend, and of being envious of the other lady helping her when I could not!

That’s when He began teaching me about army ants. He said, “The Army ants whole life existence is to keep the colony safe, secure, and fed.” Then I remembered a show I watched about army ants, how that when they came to a river or stream, they made a bridge with their bodies so that the other ants could cross over. Then if one ant sunk, another one immediately took its place, and this happened until all the ants crossed. Of course, several ants didn’t survive but gave their life for the sake of the rest! So this is what the Lord showed me. I am an army ant – We are army ants in His Kingdom. There is no one better than the other, no one has it all together, no one has all the answers, and if someone gets free from another source, the bottom line is that they got free!! We are all in this together, and it’s not about “who” does it, but that it gets done. It reminds me of the scripture that says, “Someone plants, another waters, but God gives the increase.” Boy, more repenting to do…  Besides, even if someone did find their breakthrough through a class or ministry I was conducting, it’s still NOT ME doing it, as that “increase” comes from God alone!!! Reminds me of a friend whose motto is, “We are to complete each other not compete with each other.” (This friend – a pastor – has been through a lot of hurts and painful things from other ministries, churches and Christians. That is how he came up with this motto…. perhaps I’ll share on this another time.)

So I told my husband about all this, and he looked at me and said one of his famous one liners, “Why are you such a control freak, and isn’t it exhausting?” Boy, was he right…  hmmm… more repenting to do!

I love when God shows me, “me.” It used to make me sadder, embarrassed, and I’d cry for days. But now I take it, get on with the program, repent, forgive, and all that stuff so that I can get on with life again. If I didn’t “recognize” what was happening to me and deal with it then, I would still be dragging that stuff around and could not live to the fullest. (Let me stop here for a moment, and talk to those who are feeling “sad” or “heavy – depressed”. Do what I did, go to the source when it happened, and repent for whatever and forgive whoever was involved… and I know you will find your peace restored.)

So the truth is, our goal is that everyone find salvation, everyone find freedom in the Lord, everyone find healing, and it doesn’t matter how it comes, that we simply rejoice when it does come. I believe now since I repented for jealousy and envy, and control, etc., that the next time this comes up, I will genuinely be happy from my heart. As a matter of fact, when I did repent, the Lord purged my heart from these things, so I was truly happy for that person after all!!!

I‘m growing and changing like the next person. And if anyone says any different, then they are not being honest.

As a teacher I learned a long time ago that a teacher’s job is to teach the students so that they go out and be MORE than the teacher! I had a hard time with that at first because I wanted to go out and do more too! But I’m a hub… the center of several spokes, and the students are the spokes. If a teacher moves around, how can the students find a foundation to grow and learn from? So I’ve been so excited seeing students and those I’ve been privileged to disciple and mentor, get free and some even starting their own ministries! What a blessing.